Walking My Path

I am feeling inspired this week. So I thought I would write down some goals.

Accomplish This Week:

• Catch up on Dishes
  
• Clean cabinet tops
  
• Sweep and Mop Kitchen
  
• Clean out Fridge
  
• Put up random books/papers/clothes in Living Room
  
• Vacuum rug
  
• Fold all the clean clothes
  
• Catch up on Laundry
  
• Return dishes to Mom
  
• Eat meals at dining table
  
• Meditate at least once
  
• Stay on top of watering plants
  
• Clean cat box
  
• Sweep and Mop Entryway
  

Today I woke up early on my own. I got my new laptop in yesterday and I wanted to make sure I had all the software loaded that I needed and wanted before elvnsword came online to chat. We had a good talk including the baby coming in and napping on the couch. elvnsword got to watch her sleep and that made him seriously happy. I reactivated my CoH account today too because I want to try it on my new laptop and see how it runs. I'm hoping it will run like silk. *grins*

Today I folded the diapers that I had put out on the balcony to dry. They turned out whiter than they do in the dryer but stiffer. I guess you have to choose what is more important to you. I'm going to see how the baby does with the stiffer diapers. I may end up tossing them in the dryer to soften up. *sighs* But I'm hoping it doesn't bother her because that will make me feel better about how much more laundry I've been having to do and the ecological impact. I try and limit it as much as possible by using biodegradable laundry detergent and waiting until I have a whole load of diapers before washing them, but I'm still washing them every other day or so.

I have to go in an hour and a half or so. I have my post-partum check up today. I'm a little nervous. It's a new doctor and I *hate* having to see new doctors. The doctor from before that I loved transferred to another post. I bought some SAM-E to show her and talk to her about taking it while nursing. I'm hoping that she won't try to pressure me to take pharmaceutical anti-depressants as opposed to the herbs I've been taking. And it would be nice if a Tricare doctor actually knew something about herbs for once.

8:30am Buy Bluebook CHECK
9am American History Final CHECK
10am Sell Back Books CHECK (oooh...a whole *$27* @$*# dollars)
10:30am Pick up BC CHECK
11am Lunch CHECK
12pm Study For European Final....ummm...not yet

I'm so tired...I've been running around this morning like crazy. But I now have all the paperwork I need for the rest of the semester. I need to take a test and work three hours then I am done completely. And tomorrow morning I get on a plane and go home to see my family. I'm so excited. I hope everything goes ok with the clearing of my dorm room. I must remember to take James back his books and things. My kingdom for an iced cappuchino.

I have so much homework in German I'm surprised I'm not typing this in German at the moment. I am so tired of my classes...it's a mere week and a half. I can handle this...I should not be so stressed. *sighs* But I am. I cooked dinner for a few friends. I had invited more people but most of them couldn't make it. I can see me breaking out the cookie dough next week. My assignments are starting to dwindle down though. It does appear that I will have German homework up until the day of the final though. Packing has come to a standstill for the evening as I have so much homework.

( Assignments Left: )

( Working Packing List: )

So today is my last day of my freshman year of college...Aren't I supposed to feel more grown-up? Isn't this supposed to be one of those days that I remember for the rest of my life? Why does it feel so unimportant and mundane? The only thing different is that I have that same fear in the pit of my stomach that I had when I was a senior in high school and I was graduating that night. It's this fear that I'm growing up too fast. I don't know how to make the fear go away and somehow it just keeps growing and growing. I guess maybe I am afraid that I will get old and then be disappointed in everything that I've done with my life.